I’ve eaten nearly two days worth of food in the last day. And I’m still hungry. Why?
Have you ever obsessed on something that makes no sense?That’s what the past few weeks have felt like to me. Here’s the list, in case you’re interested:
- No surprise, but as soon as I go on a diet, all I think about is food. I’ve learned that it’s possible to think about food continuously for six hours or more, all the while doing other things. Working, having conversations, going to meetings — all I could think about was how hungry I was.
- In Weight Watchers, a whole avocado is “worth” more points than an egg mcmuffin or a sausage burrito. Needless to say, I opt for the egg mcmuffin.
- Did you know you can have your monthly pimple breakout without having the corresponding menstrual period? Apparently, that’s what happens if you still have hormones. I never thought that was going to proceed. (And can I mention how fabulous it is to be a 40-something who has monthly breakouts?)
- I found out that Weight Watchers rewards you for losing weight by letting you eat less food. Apparently I’ve lost enough weight that I jumped over some line that’s changed my daily points. Lovely.
- I realized that I am more successful on a diet when I live alone.
I read once that in the US the average woman is a size 14. I know that even compared to average, which is “obese” in the eyes of the media, even compared to that I am the fat girl.
Did I mention that I chose “soylagordita” as my Weight Watchers screen name?
Anyway, you have to understand that that’s my perspective as I read this:
My first thought was, “wow, finally!” Then I read on to discover that the plus-size model is a size 12.
A 12? Are you kidding?!!!!??!!
I know, I know… media does not represent reality. And, really, my weight is not healthy or ideal. Yes, I know all of this. But I’m still indignant that a size 12 is considered plus size for this campaign.
What kind of person is tempted to lie on her Weight Watchers log even though no one else is going to see it?
I have been working really hard to keep myself honest. I need for this to work.
I feel like an addict, saying “one day at a time” to myself over and over again. But that’s how I’m taking it.
So far I’ve lost one pound, and that’s taking into consideration that I indulged over the weekend. (Yes, I was honest in my points about the indulgences.)
I’m learning the points system, since I’ve never done Weight Watchers before.
Tomorrow is another day.
Today I joined Weight Watchers online.
That is all.