Rules for a public restroom

Lock the Door!
Edited, Photo by Koocheekoo

I realize that not everyone thinks the same way, but I’ve decided that I need to share some basic rules for using a public restroom. If nothing else, this will keep me from yelling at some random person in real life.

Rules to follow

1. Lock the Door! If you are using one of the stalls in the employee restroom in a building with 100+ employees, then it’s your responsibility to lock the door. I am not going to knock. Expecting me to knock is ridiculous. And getting mad at me because I saw your naked backside because I didn’t knock is stupid. It’s your fault.

If you consistently refuse to lock the door, and have the repeated experience of flashing some poor unsuspecting coworkers (namely me), I have to infer that you are a closet flasher and want to inflict your nakedness on others. Get help.

2. Don’t pollute the air! There are some smells that are unavoidable, and I’m leaving that conversation untouched. However, if you absolutely cannot go through the day without spritzing yourself with your favorite perfume or scent several times a day, do not do it in the shared/public bathroom. Despite how much you like it, the rest of us are choking on the smell for the next few hours. That’s just inconsiderate.

3. Despite the name, it’s not a BATHroom. I applaud your desire to use your lunch hour to power walk. That’s great. It’s wonderful that you are taking that time to improve your health. But, and here’s the truth, you cannot use the bathroom as your “in lieu of shower” location. Do not give yourself a spongebath using one of the few sinks available to the rest of us. And, I implore you, do not do this in full view of everyone else. Have some modesty, or at least some respect for the public area.

4. Clean up after yourself. And, last but not least, do not leave presents on the seat. I’m not quite sure about the acrobatics it takes to leave that level of… evidence of your presence every time your visit the bathroom. What I do know is that you leaving it there is gross. And, since (theoretically) you’re an adult, I have to assume it’s on purpose.

Also, if you’re going to run the water and wash your hands in such a way that the entire counter is left wet, then you are expected to clean it up. Yes, we do have custodians who come in to clean the room a few times a day. However, it’s not likely they’re going to get to it before the next person in line tries to wash her hands without endingup with water (and soap) all over her clothes because you were too lazy to watch where you were dripping.

I’m sure there are other rules, but these are the ones I needed to share today.

And thus endeth the public service announcement.

Author: Paloma Cruz

Find out more about Paloma Cruz through the About page. Connect with her on Twitter ( and (Facebook).

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