stories from an ordinary life …
And the wedding has happened!
I have much to share, but am still in wedding mode. Family is still visiting, we are still wrapping up the wedding activities.
Eventually I will get back in front of a computer again.
NOTES:
And the wedding has happened!
I have much to share, but am still in wedding mode. Family is still visiting, we are still wrapping up the wedding activities.
Eventually I will get back in front of a computer again.
NOTES:
My sisters and I (and my mother) didn’t throw a bridal shower for my sister-in-law-to-be because her mother was supposed to be planning one. It’s a small wedding, we told ourselves, we really couldn’t justify two showers. But we wanted to throw our own. We really really wanted to throw our own with all the bells and whistles we knew we could add to it. We were good and stepped aside and let her mother take care of it.
Instead, we planned a co-ed “boys and girls night out.” Since he doesn’t have a best man and she doesn’t have bridesmaids or a maid of honor, we figured we’d do a nice dinner and dancing get-together. That’s where we poured our planning expertise.
But the wedding got closer and we didn’t hear about a wedding shower. Not a peep. Not a word. And, since we’re not close with her family, we tried to get info on it without putting her in the middle. (We’ve tried to bond with them, even hosting several mixed-family events; they’ve been a failure.)
One day my mother told me, in hushed tones, that my brother confided to her that his mother-in-law-to-be wasn’t going to throw her oldest child and only daughter a shower for her first (and hopefully last) wedding. We were all suitably appalled and contrite. If we’d know, we said over and over, we would have done it ourselves. This is what happens when you try to be nice and let others plan things instead of taking over.
And so, with the wedding a mere two weeks away, we adjusted.
But… she did have a shower. It was a dinner. It was only for her side of the family.
They didn’t call it a shower. They didn’t have it at a hall, or with games or any of that traditional stuff. But it was a shower. And we were excluded.
My brother refuses to talk about it. We’ve all agreed not to approach my sister-in-law-to-be about this at this time. My mother, my sisters and I have all decided that we’re tabling this entire issue until the wedding is behind us. Then… may whatever god they pray to help them all.
Photo courtesy of http://www.flickr.com/photos/20574219@N06/3802742192/.
The accomplishment of the week was when I found the dress I am wearing to my brother’s wedding. If you’ve ever had to find a dress for a formal occasion, as a “voluptuous” woman, then you’ll know that’s indeed an accomplishment. Shopping is hard work.
It wasn’t cheap.
If I’d been willing to spend a lot of time shopping, going from store to store, trying on dresses, and comparing, then I might have been able to find something less expensive. I wasn’t going to do that and my pocketbook shows it.
(NOTE: the dresses shown here are just a stock image, not the actual dress.)
I started out the the bridal shop where my sister-in-law-to-be bought her wedding dress. I found two dresses I liked and that I would have been willing to buy. I was told it would take six weeks for them to get either dress for me. Six weeks! That would mean I wouldn’t get the dress until the week before the wedding. And at least one of the dresses needed alterations. Obviously, I didn’t buy either.
Three shops later, I found two wonderful dresses at Nordstrom’s in the Galleria. I should have started there. I have had wonderful luck shopping for special-occasion dresses at that store. I bought both, and neither was on sale. I should point out that neither needed any alterations either.
One of the dresses is a fitted purple knee-length cocktail dress. It fits well, but I’m absolutely going to need some “support” when I wear it. The other is a floor-length champagne sleeveless dress with a full skirt and the embroidery on the bodice; it’s accompanied by a sheer embroidered jacket.
Now I just have to find shoes and accessories… and decide which dress I’m actually wearing to the event. I have weeks to do that.
Photo via http://www.flickr.com/photos/rockinfree/4458681575/.
We were at the bridal shop, watching my sister-in-law-to-be try on dresses. Arianna and David were seated next to me, which is how I got to hear the whole conversation.
My sister was saying that she always wanted to have a vow renewal ceremony, get married again, and asked David (teasingly) if he’d like to be in that wedding. David said he wanted to be the flower girl.
Of course, my sister replied (aghast) that he couldn’t be the flower girl since he’s not a girl. David was not impressed by this argument and insisted that that’s what he wanted to be. (Very few arguments ever convince David that he’s wrong about something. He’s so completely his mother’s child that way.)
My sister tried to coax him in another role by asking if he wouldn’t rather be the ring bearer. And he responded with a “No way!” that was rather more forceful than the conversation deserved.
After some discussion about this, with a back and forth between the two of them, he says “I don’t want to have to dress up in a bear costume.” Ring bearer. And nothing we told him would convince him that he’d heard wrong.
I love that kid.
Photo by epSos .de at http://www.flickr.com/photos/epsos/8077027930/.